1) The Girl Who Can do Anything
2) The Golden Child
3) A Prude
4) The Kid Parents Want Their Kids to Hang Out With
5) The Singer
6) The Future Star
7) The Dreamer
8) The Dedicated Black Belt
9) The Nerd
10) The Forever Alone One
11) The Strong Independent One
12) The Jesus Freak
13) The Crazy One
14) The Sarcastic One
15) The Princess
16) The Bossy One
17) The Responsible One
18) The Ambitious One
19) The Bookworm
20) The Smart Kid
This is by no means an exhaustive list. It isn't in any particular order... and I'm not saying that all of these things are bad or that they are wrong. I am proud to be some of these things, but I'm learning that these things are not WHO I AM. I am a complex person. I make mistakes, I push people away, I fight, I lash out, I'm an emotional mess.... but I'm me. I am tired of people telling me who I should be.
Chances are that unless you have tried to get a hold of me this summer, you have heard nothing. I am tired of fighting to keep people in my life who don't want to be there. Whether it be family members, "friends", or classmates I don't want to have to try so hard to make people like me and want to be around me. I'm tired of people-pleasing, always texting first, always being the counselor, and tired of feeling alone.... now I don't mind these things some times... but not all the time.
This summer I have taken the time to really really think about what I want, who I am, and where I am going in my life. I've taken time to reflect on who is important to me, what is important to me, and what I need to do to live a life I'm proud of. I've made interesting changes in my habits... I work a minimum of five days a week. Spare time I have is not spent going out, but spent at home with my parents or Netflix or my Bible.
I do not want to be defined as one of the labels above... but there are so many characteristics I want to have... Every day I'm striving towards being a woman that:
1) Is Kind to Everyone She Meets
2) Puts Smiles on the Faces of Those She Comes in Contact With
3) Is an Excellent Reflection of the Lord
4) Helps in Any Way She Can
5) Does Not Hold Grudges
6) Understands Her Value
7) Is Content Being Alone
8) Is Content Being With Someone Else
9) Pursues Her Dreams With Passion
10) Stands for What She Believes
I'm actually doing a pretty good job living like this.... but I'm not perfect. AT ALL.
I no longer want to be perfect. I want to be me. I want to live a life that rocks the boat a little... Given the current state of the world around us, the boat needs to be rocked a bit. This summer has given me a strength I never ever knew I had. .This summer has given me a confidence in who I am capable of being that I never knew was possible... I'm ready to stand up and to speak up. I'm ready to make a difference in the lives of those around me and to make a difference around the world... whether it be donating to missions trips or helping an elderly woman find a card at the store or serving with a smile... I don't want to be a silent observer. I want to shake things up. I want to Roar.
Resonating Lyrics:
I used to bite my tongue and hold my breath.
Scared to rock the boat or make a mess
So I sat quietly, agreed politely.
I guess that I forgot I had a choice,
let you push me past the breaking point
I stood for nothing so I fell for everything.
You held me down but I got up
Already brushing off the dust
You hear my voice, you hear that sound
like thunder gonna shake the ground
You held me down, but I got up
Get ready 'cause I've had enough
I see it all, I see it now
I got the eye of the tiger, a fighter, dancing through the fire
'Cause I am a champion and you're gonna hear me roar
Really the whole song resonates... but you get the picture
